I Believe in Love
Thirty years ago today I stood on a threshold facing a precipice that I did not approach lightly or easily. I knew the real dangers of infatuation, of unrequited love, of cruel indifference to a soul laid bare. I carried the wounds from risking too much, from hoping too much, from believing in false realities. A tender-hearted creature, as most young lovers are, I was scared from years of doing battle with the all-consuming passion of romantic love. I knew the risk involved in daring to love another.
That day, I chose hope. I chose to love again. I chose to believe that a one and only was not only possible, but had been made visible in my life. Mine. With fear and trembling I chose to risk again; to believe in happy endings; to believe that a shared life could be better for me than a solitary life. I chose to believe that my partner wanted what was best for me, as I did him.
Thirty years ago today, I walked down the aisle on my father’s arm, tears running down both our faces. To the call of a trumpet, my eyes locked onto the eyes of the man that stood waiting at the front of the church. My body, mind and soul, were propelled forward by the power of commitment. He was already my one and only…my rock…my foundation…my strength.
As we said our vows, we looked into each other’s eyes and the truth and honesty we shared in that moment remains emblazoned in our memories and on our hearts. Neither one of us, before or since, has felt the depth of commitment to any other thing or person, that was declared by us that day.
Since that day in May of 1982, we have continued to lay our hearts bare, to risk, to dare to hope, again and again. We have suffered and we have struggled. Life has not been easy. But together, we have fought our fears, our doubts, our angers and frustrations with every ounce of strength that is in us. We are still wounded warriors, but we are standing, and we are strong. We are stronger, more deeply committed to our marriage and more deeply in love than we were that day. Our commitment to one another has not faded. It has withstood the most audacious of challenges.
I’ve often said that I believe in God because our relationship is a miracle. It is more a miracle to me today than ever before. It has defied all odds. It remains the truest thing I know on this earth. It is a miracle and I am blessed. We are blessed. Because of this miracle I will always believe in love. I will always believe in happy-ever-after.