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I Believe in Love

May 22, 2012

Thirty years ago today I stood on a threshold facing a precipice that I did not approach lightly or easily. I knew the real dangers of infatuation, of unrequited love, of cruel indifference to a soul laid bare. I carried the wounds from risking too much, from hoping too much, from believing in false realities. A tender-hearted creature, as most young lovers are, I was scared from years of doing battle with the all-consuming passion of romantic love. I knew the risk involved in daring to love another.

That day, I chose hope. I chose to love again. I chose to believe that a one and only was not only possible, but had been made visible in my life. Mine. With fear and trembling I chose to risk again; to believe in happy endings; to believe that a shared life could be better for me than a solitary life. I chose to believe that my partner wanted what was best for me, as I did him.

Thirty years ago today, I walked down the aisle on my father’s arm, tears running down both our faces. To the call of a trumpet, my eyes locked onto the eyes of the man that stood waiting at the front of the church. My body, mind and soul, were propelled forward by the power of commitment. He was already my one and only…my rock…my foundation…my strength.

As we said our vows, we looked into each other’s eyes and the truth and honesty we shared in that moment remains emblazoned in our memories and on our hearts. Neither one of us, before or since, has felt the depth of commitment to any other thing or person, that was declared by us that day.

Since that day in May of 1982, we have continued to lay our hearts bare, to risk, to dare to hope, again and again. We have suffered and we have struggled.  Life has not been easy. But together, we have fought our fears, our doubts, our angers and frustrations with every ounce of strength that is in us. We are still wounded warriors, but we are standing, and we are strong. We are stronger, more deeply committed to our marriage and more deeply in love than we were that day. Our commitment to one another has not faded. It has withstood the most audacious of challenges.

I’ve often said that I believe in God because our relationship is a miracle.  It is more a miracle to me today than ever before. It has defied all odds. It remains the truest thing I know on this earth.  It is a miracle and I am blessed. We are blessed. Because of this miracle I will always believe in love. I will always believe in happy-ever-after.

13 Comments leave one →
  1. May 22, 2012 4:19 pm

    How true and beautifully written this is! I have also been married for thirty years and I appreciate your sentiments. Congratulations to both of you!

  2. May 22, 2012 4:37 pm

    Congratulations! Your enduring relationship is indeed wonderful and blessed. It is wonderful to have a companian throughout life with whom you’ve shared so much. I know. I married the guy I met in 9th grade. We’re in our early 60’s now.

  3. May 22, 2012 9:27 pm

    Thank you! In some ways it feels like yesterday and in others it feels a million years ago. Marriage, especially ones that last too often seem a thing of the past. I’m glad to have company!

  4. Stephanie permalink
    May 22, 2012 10:16 pm

    Dave and I celebrated 20 years this past September. We’ve known each other for 30. You are so right that it feels like yesterday and a million years. It’s an odd thing. But we both know each other better than anyone else in the world. That’s oddly comforting. And then I think of my parents who have been married for over 50 years. I’ve got a long way to go! Much love to you both.

    • May 22, 2012 11:52 pm

      It’s wonderful to see you here Stephanie! Time goes by so quickly. Nothing moves along or happens the way we think it will when we set out in life. Being “known” by another is the most valuable gift of all and your parents were/are such a good example for all of us. My parents were married somewhere around 60 years. That seems eons away but I do hope we get that much time together in this life!

  5. May 23, 2012 6:17 am

    Lovely. Congratulations! Like you, as the years pass, it becomes more a more amazing to me that Brad and my love continues to not just exist but flourish. After 33 years we are more in love than ever. Have a magical day.

    • May 23, 2012 8:47 am

      Wow Lisa! I’m honored! Thanks for the good wishes. Like you no doubt, it’s been one hell of a ride! (Now if the kids would just move out!) 🙂

  6. De De permalink
    May 23, 2012 9:36 am

    Congratulations! I agree it is wonderful to be able to trust, and love again after the pain and sadness of past loves lost. My husband and i have been married 22 years after both of us being married before and very hesitant to love and trust again. It has been a wonderful journey for us. We know each other better than anyone else also and that is such a comforting feeling. We look out for each other, do little things that matter, and are always there in good and bad times. I hope you make it together for many more years. Congrats again!

  7. May 23, 2012 9:28 pm

    Congratulations on the greatest gift of all-love! Beautifully-written and I can relate to the feeling that the love of your life is a miracle and a gift. Wishing you many more years of happiness. Thanks for sharing for it gets me in touch with the gift of love in my life!

  8. May 24, 2012 1:16 am

    Congrats! And I second the comments above….thank you for sharing this beautiful day of yours with all of us!

  9. May 24, 2012 8:01 am

    Thank you ladies! for being a part of my celebration of hope! You are the perfect witnesses .

  10. May 25, 2012 12:16 am

    Dorothy ~ Congratulations! How wonderful that you’ve come this far in life together. And how wonderful to have a loving companion, lover & friend for life! May you have many many more happy years together.

  11. May 30, 2012 9:28 am

    i have always believed in love and the thought that love conquers all. Until today, however, i have not ever seen it expressed more beautifully nor illicit such genuine responses that show the truth and reality of married love. I have not had such a love and while I’ve never given up hope, I have been doubtful and discouraged at times. Thanks for restoring my faith.

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