I’ve needed a fresh perspective and to spend a little less time thinking about aging and put a little more of my focus on moving forward in my life’s journey. There’s so much noise and confusion on the internet when it comes to the woman over fifty, I feel as though my words are lost in the haze. I will still blog here, but for the next 14 weeks (at least) I will be blogging on Manifest Me 2014.
Originally posted on Manifest Me 2014:
I wrote the poem, posted my first quote and was somehow, immediately and without a care in te world (ha!) swept away by my quote site. My creative genius friend caught wind of what I was doing and between the two of us, spinning in the ever-widening circles of our imaginations, created a tempest in a teapot!
Now, I’m back here, two months later, taking another stab at “manifesting me”. I am beginning a new project on a new day. That one is over there somewhere doing it’s thing and I will continue to work away on it, but….is it me? No, not really. In…
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For better than ten years I have been reading, researching, thinking, writing, talking, listening and sharing on issues of interest to women at midlife and beyond. I have personally felt, and heard from those I’ve talked to, a sense of urgency, of deep and earnest interest in finding that “something more” in life that can guide and inspire us to live authentically and creatively in our remaining years. There is a desire to set aside the day-to-day ordinariness, the worries and cares, the striving toward something and learn instead to embrace the abundance that is right within our reach, to discover our gifts and use them and to live in gratitude for what we have right now in our lives.
This is what I have come to call the “aging abundantly” life style and it is one that often requires major changes in our understanding of ourselves and our relationships, an altering of our expectations and focus, the implementation of daily practices and the on-going effort to create subtle shifts in our behavior and surrounding world. What we discover in the process is an authentic lifestyle that resonates with who we are at our deepest core selves; we develop a connection to what one might call our spiritual/soul selves — that part of us that is and always has been with us, a constant, ever-present, though sometimes silent witness and influence in our lives. Each day we deepen our connection to our soul selves and a deeper awareness of our purpose for being here.
It is a process, of course, and we are all at various stages in this process. What I would like to hear more about from you is this: If you are following this path, what have you found to be your stumbling blocks? What trips you up? What issues/questions are you struggling with now? What have you struggled with in the past? Where do you look for answers and direction? What type of help and support have you found most beneficial in the past, what support would you like to have now? Is there a question you would like to ask me, personally or professionally? I am here for you, let’s talk.
(If you are not comfortably leaving a public comment, please feel free to send me an email to AgingAbundantly@gmail.com. I am the only one who reads the emails sent to this address.)
Money is a funny thing. Just the thought of its absence can send us into a tailspin of fear and anxiety. The what ifs of life can keep us awake at night and shake our confidence in tomorrow. I have had so many sleepless nights and anxiety ridden days worrying about money. Would there be enough for the needs of my children, from school projects, to clothes, to college tuition? Would I be able to give them the experiences that I believed would make them well-rounded adults? Trips, concerts, art and history museums, time spent in different parts of the country, or world? Everything seemed to cost money, and often more than we had. My children’s well-being was always at the top of my worry list but so many other things followed behind.
My child raising days are over and in spite of all my worries, my children had “enough”. They might have had a little more of me had I not been so wrapped up in my worries! I’ve come to accept, however, that we all do the best we can as parents and the rest is up to them. And darn, if they aren’t doing a pretty good job of making a life for themselves. They are good, kind and caring people…in an often less than kind world.
When money stresses ease, and I begin to dream, I find that I don’t dream about expensive jewelry or a bigger house. I don’t think about new furniture, a new wardrobe, or a new car. I do think about taking a class, visiting a friend or buying a book. I’ve recently re-discovered a few things that I used to take for granted, before I went for so long without them and I am struck by how much comfort the little things can bring. They symbolism something much more than the having of a possession. They symbolize security, warmth and comfort.
Here is a short list of a few of those things:
I love socks! Wigwams are my favorite, but anything colorful makes me smile.
A Good book.
It doesn’t take money…at least not much…to make us rich.
What are the little things that make you feel as though you are living an abundant life?
OTHER POSTS YOU MIGHT ENJOY:
A lovely blog I feel certain you will enjoy as much as I did.
Originally posted on A Heart's Whispers:
We keep wanting ‘it’ to be ‘something.’ We go in search of ‘it’ hoping ‘it’ will reveal itself to us. Our minds tell us ‘it’ will be tangible, touchable, definable. And yet, when we go into the space of our hearts all those words and the need for definitions fall away.
Love. Purpose. Calling. Longing.
What’s the ‘it’ they are leading us to?
Here’s the truth, my loves, there is no ‘it.’
Yes. Take a moment and let that sink in.
There is no treasure at the end of the rainbow awaiting our arrival. There is no moment in the middle of a conference where we suddenly feel light shine down upon us and we know what we are here to do.
SHE is not that contained. She is a feeling of elation when our child does something amazing. She is the deep desire we feel for our Lover as…
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I met Carol for the first time a little over a year ago. I didn’t notice at the time that she was a small woman, so large was her interest in me and all that was going on in my world. I admired, immediately, her ability to know her own mind and state it clearly. It made being with her a breeze. No second guessing. No accommodating. She seems to have worked out all the kinks about herself in the little areas of life that can take up so much of us, like what to order at Starbucks when we go for coffee… “I’ll have a Venti Extra Hot 2 Pump Peppermint Cafe Mocha please,” and she’ll turn to me for me to order, and…I’m not so clear. Never have been. So, I follow her lead and order the same, only I request a Tall instead of a Venti. She knows I’m counting my pennies and turns back to the counter and says, “She’ll have the Venti” and turns back to me and says, “My treat.” It’s taken some time, but I’ve learned not to argue with her.
She’s a single woman about my age, with beautiful, long, full, silver-gray locks that she sweeps up in a scrunchy at the back of her head with great ease…another thing I will ask her to teach me one day when I can afford to buy a scrunchy. I know it can’t be as easy as it looks.
Carol came into my life on a wing and prayer. Right after she moved into our neighborhood, she nabbed my husband in the driveway on her way home from work. She wanted his expertise on some home renovations she had undertaken. The house was a foreclosure and in desperate need of work. A week later she invited us out for pizza for our feedback on her paint color choices for the exterior of her house. It wasn’t long before we started connecting by text at the end of the day, and over dinner at one or the other’s home.
Carol is a survivor. Uprooted when a job change was forced upon her, she left behind a beautiful old home, one she had renovated with her own two hands. It ultimately went into foreclosure when it would not sell (compliments of the miss-steps of the banking industry), and carrying two mortgages no longer made sense to her. In the process, she lost her credit worthiness, and a significant amount of money that she had invested in the restoration.
Carol doesn’t let life get her down. “It’s all about Freecell” she told me not long ago. “Freecell?”, I asked. “Yeah, the game. Have you ever played it.” Sure I have. I became a master at it before I realized needlepoint was more productive and just as much fun.
“Life is like Freecell. You just have to look for the next move. There’s always another move.”
She’s so right! I immediately took her “Freecell” concept, because it is so visual and visual works for me, and applied it to my own “problems”. It’s so freeing. It’s so hope-full. It’s so life affirming, and my problems are no longer problems. They are secondary. It’s the “next move” that is my focus now. Thank you, Carol.
Dorothy Sander © 2014